Chapter 6 - Not Exactly A Run Through The Field Of Dreams

A vase smashes the wall as Kid Rock dives out of the way. After several more plates, vases, and virtually anything else Christina can get her hands on to throw at him, he says, "It's not my fault!"
"YES it is!! It is always your fault! I don't make mistakes!" Christina shrieks. "Now the whole trio is together!! Do you have any idea how much trouble they can cause? They nearly killed Rap with MMMBop!"
"I know your High and Mightiness maybe we can still keep them from reaching OZ?" Kid Rock whimpers as he dodges yet another vase. Christina is screaming.
"OH?" She pauses for a moment ready to hurl another priceless vase.
"We can use the magic weed! How about that?" Kid Rock says in a desperate tone.
"Yes the magical marijuana! I should have thought of it earlier." Christina quips with an evil grin.
She goes over to a cauldron and lifts the lid. A mystical aroma rises form the seed therein. Kid Rock takes a whiff, a goofy grin comes over his face, his eyes roll into the back of his head and he falls to the ground as the witch starts to cackle. She starts sprinkling the seeds over the top of a crystal ball; the seeds are transported to the grassland between the dark forest and OZ. The field of clover suddenly changes as tall slender plants rise form the ground. In seconds the area is covered with the magical marijuana plants. A bird flies over the field and swoops down to grab a worm, it finishes its snack, then staggers around a bit, chirps in a very odd fashion, flops around and then falls to the ground in a deep magical sleep.

[fade to black]

Dorothy, Scarecrow, Tinman, and Lion skip arm in arm. The Lion and Scarecrow on either side of Dorothy with Tinman on the side of Scarecrow, who has a bit of trouble keeping his balance. As they skip out of the forest they are greeted by a huge open plain. In the distance they can see OZ in all its splendor.

[*That Smell* by Foreigner plays]

"All we have to do is cross this field of bamboo and we are there!" Tinman says excitedly.
"Bamboo? You sure?" asks Scarecrow.
"Yeah , come on lets go!" Tinman replies.

The group rushes headlong into the magical field of wacky weed. They dance and laugh through the plants, thinking their trip is almost over. They slow down a bit and Dorothy starts to giggle, then the Lion starts to giggle, then the Scarecrow, and finally the Tinman.
"What is this weird feeling?" Scarecrow asks.
"Dunno, but looks like Scrappy has a thing for Tinman's leg." Lion roars with laughter.
"Cut it out mutt!" As Tinman punts Scrappy on down the road.
The dog lands and curls up and takes a nap, with a big grin on his face. Dorothy, Scarecrow, and Lion can't contain themselves, the fumes from the magical weed is taking hold. Tinman, giggling at himself, releases a catch on his arm and out pops a mini-video cam. He starts taping the others .
"Now I got you me pretties! " he quips in a girlish voice, sending the others into fits of laughter.
Scarecrow walks over and Tinman slurs, "Ya know , I don't think this stuff is bamboo, Tay."
Scarecrow quips, "Really! I think we are bamboozled! ... Hey , how umm... come are you being effected anywho metal head?"
Tinman gets a perplexed look on his face, "Ummm magic?"
As the two stagger over to Lion and Dorothy who seem to be leaning on each other trying to make a conversation between giggle fits. The Lion separates himself from Dorothy and taps the Tinman on the head.
"Hey chips for brains, your not suppose... to call him Tay, he is...umm....lets see....umm, well he isn't Tay. Do you have anything to eat? I am starved!"
Tinman points the camera at Scarecrow.
"Cool where did you get that Ike?"
"It was one of my attachments." Tinman replies.
"OHHHHH!" giggles Scarecrow, "attachments!" He falls over backwards laughing and hit's the ground with a loud thud. The Lion wobbles over and looks down at the Scarecrow. Dorothy staggers over to join him.
"Are you ok?" they say in unison.
The Scarecrow opens his eyes and looks up at the Lion, "I Taught I Taw a Putty Tat!"
They all laugh and the Lion sticks out his hand to help up the Scarecrow but instead looses his balance and fall on top the Scarecrow.
"OOOFF! You trying to kill me bro?"
The Lion rolls off and exclaims in a very poor imitation of Forest Gump, "Help! I have fallen and can't get up !"
Dorothy tries to pull him up but then falls over on top of the two of them.
"Owww! Taylor, you are way to bony!" Dorothy exclaims, "Zac he is just soft and lumpy."
The Lion motions for her to get close and he whispers in her ear.
"Oh my! Taylor you really should hear what your younger brother said... Tay???"
A soft snoring is heard, he is out like a light. The other two giggle softly and Dorothy turns back to the Lion and starts twirling his long mane in her fingers. They giggle a bit, trying to find the words to say while in the mind numbing haze. Dorothy gives up trying to talk and just lays her head on the Lion's chest. A low soft purr comes form the lion and soon both Dorothy and the Lion are deep in sleep. Tinman puts his camera back in its place.
Says to himself with an evil grin, "With a little editing; guess we know who will sing lead on the next album. I better go get some help." He turns and staggers a few steps, his eyes roll back and with a loud thud falls to the ground.

[fade to black]

Glenda looks over the scene in her magic mirror.
"Not good, not good at all, they will sleep forever if I don't act fast." She paces back and forth in her study, "I have to call on the experts to handle this."
As she reaches for her phone the scene fades from her back to the field. The group is in sound asleep in the magical field. The sound of a truck backfiring can be heard. Coming up towards the sleeping group is a large pink and flowery panel van. The van pulls up and rocks to a stop within a foot of the sleeping Tinman. The doors open and smoke pours out the sides as Cheech and Chong stagger out of the van.
"HEEEYYYY Man, dig that crazy smell, man." says Cheech.
"Oh WOW, dude! Glenda was so righteous about this stuff, man," Chong replies, "And she said we can have all we want! What a gal!"
"Yeah man, but first we have to get these guys into some fresh air, man," grumbles Cheech.
"OH Man! You said the *f* word!!!" grimaces Chong.
They go around to the back of the van and open the doors and as they stagger to the fallen people.
"WOAH!!!! My head!! Oh Man this stuff is, like, oh man, wait!" Cheech says stumbling to a halt. A slow grin overtakes his face and he taps Chong on the shoulder.
"Man, this magic stuff, it is messing with my head, yeah, I just had a stroke of genius! Its turning me into a regular Eintsteinbrenner!"
"Really dude? Wow, all I get I pretty colors." Chong replies.
"Hurry up, dude, and load them I got us a great idea, man." Cheech stammers.
"Ok, man you so smart then ... ungh.... why they got to make them robots outta metal?," Chong groans as he lifts the Tinman and staggers toward the van, "Why can't they use plastic or something? Eh man?"
Cheech smirks , "Because plasitc would ... ummm... melt... Yah!... That's it!"
Chong comes up with Scrappy Doo rolled into a ball, "Hey watch this!" And he takes the bowling stance takes three swaggering steps forward and throws the pup in the van. The sound of a ball on a lane is heard as the two lean first one way then the other until a loud strike is heard. They give each other high-fives and close the back and get back in the van.
"Cheech? When we get a bowling alley in the van?" Chong asks.
"Hell if I know but, man, but what an option package." Cheech replies as he fires up the van and head towards OZ.

Dorothy slowly opens her eyes and can't understand why she is looking at a large green sign with a picture of a yellow deer on it. She hears groans coming from around her. Slowly the Scarecrow, Loin, Tinman, and Scrappy regain consciousness. They all blink at the sunlight and then hear a voice.
"Hey man! You guys is gonna be ok now. Glenda sent us to git you otta there." Cheech says. "No place for rookies you, ya know."
A Loud engine rumbling is heard outside the van.
"Glenda sends her best and says to hurry on to OZ. Now I got to go, ummm forgot something back there. You guys have a good one." Cheech says as he opens the door just as a large combine pulls into view. Cheech climbs on board and Chong sounds the horn and off they go to collect their reward. The group staggers out of the van and slowly head down the path, moaning not singing, and the Lion asks...
"Anyone got anything to eat?"

[fade to black]

<< Next Page of Story>>
<< Previous Page of Story>>

<< Back to Story Page>>
<< Back To Index Of Chapters Page>>
Back To Main Page>>