[HANSON STORIES]

To See Beyond The Surface

Chapter 29 - As The Days Go By - Continued




Taylor entered the studio noticing Ike and Zac were going over some lyrics. He rolled his chair next to them as they turned around and smiled.

"What's up guys?" Taylor asked curiously.
"Just going over the new song we wrote yesterday." Ike stated handing Taylor a copy of the song.
"What part are you working on?"
"The bridge. We're almost done." Zac said smiling.
"Hmmmm... looks great!" Taylor smiled reading over the words. "Let's try playing it."
"Sure let's get set up." Ike said getting up from his chair and walking over to his guitar and plugging it in.
Taylor rolled his chair over to his keyboards and noticed some wires on the floor were stopping his chair from getting next to it. He rolled back and tried again and still he was stuck. Anger started to build inside as he tried again.
"Who put these damn wires here?!" Taylor yelled looking at Zac accusingly.
"I didn't! Don't look at me! And don't swear at me either!" Zac shouted defending himself feeling hurt.
"Calm down Tay. I'll get them out of the way for you." Ike expressed sadly and put down his guitar and lifted up the wires and moved them out of the way so Taylor could get next to his keyboard. Taylor looked up at Ike sadly and then cast his eyes quickly away feeling stupid for getting so mad.
"Zac? I'm sorry. I didn't mean it! This stupid wheelchair is just getting to me!" Taylor apologized noticing Zac's eyes were filled with tears.
"Don't worry about it Tay. It's fine." Zac whispered swallowing hard.
Finally they were ready to go and Zac clicked his sticks together counting one, two, three and the music filled the room. The song was going along great when Taylor missed a cue and stopped.
"Ummm... sorry guys." Taylor said smiling sheepishly and blushed a little.
"Okay again! One, Two, Three...!" Zac yelled and they started to play again.
Suddenly Taylor stopped again losing his concentration. He whipped his hand across the keys in anger.
"Tay? Are you alright?" Ike asked walking up to Taylor feeling concerned.
"Yeah! I..I guess I just can't get into it today guys. I keep losing it. Do you mind if we do this later? I am so tired and my hip is killing me from the therapy Alice had me doing today." Taylor complained tearfully looking from Ike to Zac.
"Sure Tay. No problem." Ike said gently rubbing Taylor's shoulder.
"I..I just want to take a nap for awhile and then maybe tonight we can practice again." Taylor stated swallowing hard feeling like he was a burden to his brothers.
"That's fine Tay. You do look sleepy." Zac said.
"Thanks for understanding." Taylor mumbled and backed his chair out from behind the keyboard and headed quickly for the door. He left the room and headed for his bedroom feeling angry and depressed. He was near the door when Sherri popped out from around the corner.
"Hi Taylor!" Sherri said with a smile while sipping on a can of soda.
"Hi." Taylor muttered under his breath not looking up at her afraid she would see the tears forming in his eyes. He opened the door and rolled into the bedroom quickly and shut the door.
Sherri looked at the closed door sadly and touched it lightly. She knew Taylor looked sad and upset over something. She wished she could help.
"Please God. Take care of Taylor. Let him heal quickly." She prayed and continued then to walk down the hallway to go into the living room to join Jessie who invited her to stay and watch a movie with her.

Taylor sat in the chair staring at the bed. Some tears spilled down his face. He wiped them away and angrily looked down at his legs.
"Why can't I walk yet!?" He said to no one in a frustrated tone.
Suddenly an idea hit him. He wondered if he could walk or at least take a few steps. After all the weeks of therapy he thought he should be able too. Maybe Alice was wrong saying he wasn't ready yet. He pulled the chair closer to the bed and locked the wheels into place. Slowly he inched forward in the seat. He placed one hand on the dresser to his left and his other hand on the arm of the chair and very carefully pulled himself up. Sweat started to bead on his forehead from the effort. He finally got up into a standing position and felt triumphant that he actually stood. A smile formed across his face.
"If Alice could only see this!" Taylor exclaimed happily feeling so proud of himself.
With all the effort he could muster he brought his left foot forward even though his foot dragged across the floor. Pain shot through his hip as he placed his weight down on the leg. Sweat poured down his face. He slowly brought his right leg forward and put his weight on that leg to relieve the pain he felt in his left leg. He gingerly took another step and suddenly lost his balance with fear rushing through him as he tumbled forward onto the floor bringing down a bottle of cologne with him. He hit the floor hard causing a lot of noise. The glass shattered around him from the bottle. Bolts of pain shot through him as he screamed from the agony. He rolled into a ball and sobbed uncontrollably as his family came bolting into the room wondering what happened when they heard a crashing sound resound around the house and heard Taylor scream.
Walker ran up to Taylor and immediately lifted him up as Ike and Zac and the rest of the family stood in shock at the scene before them.
"Taylor? What happened? Did you fall out of your chair?" Walker asked carrying Taylor over to the bed and gently put him down on it.
"I..I just was trying to wa...walk and lost my ba..balance!" Taylor stammered as the tears flowed down his face.
"But Tay... Alice said you weren't ready to walk yet! You shouldn't have tried that! You could have hurt yourself. Are you hurt?" Walker asked sternly but had a worried look on his face as he quickly checked Taylor over.
"I..I know! But I thought I could. I..I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Taylor cried pitifully as he rolled onto his side not wanting to face his father or family.
"Taylor? It's okay... but don't try that again though. Not till Alice says you are ready." Walker consoled gently as he lovingly rubbed Taylor's back feeling sorry for him. Taylor nodded his head still facing the wall as his body shook from the sobs that he couldn't control any longer. All the frustration was overwhelming him.
"Please tell everyone to go away! Please go away! I don't want anyone to see me like this!" Taylor yelled feeling ashamed and humiliated.
Walker looked up at everyone peering through the door and waved his hand signaling for them to go. Diana nodded and gently pushed everyone away and quietly shut the door to leave Walker and Taylor alone.
"There Taylor. Everyone is gone now. Now turn around and look at me Tay." Walker crooned gently pulling on Taylor's shoulder to turn him around. Taylor rolled onto his back and sadly looked up into his father's eyes.
"Dad... I..I..." Taylor tried to talk but was overwhelmed with another bout of sobs. He covered his face with his hands and cried.
"Ohhh... Tay. Tay? It is going to be alright. Alice was telling me that you are making great progress. Why are you so upset?" Walker asked rubbing his hand across Taylor's tummy trying to calm his son down.
"I want... I want to walk! I want to be normal again. It's taking too long. Why? Why is it taking so long? I think I am never going to walk again!" Taylor cried bringing his hands down from his face and desperately searched his father's sad eyes.
"Taylor? Of course you are going to walk again. Just give it time. It is going to take a while before you are completely healed." Walker said grabbing Taylor's shaking hand.
"I..I guess so." Taylor said sadly wiping the tears from his face with his other hand.
"You will. I know you Tay! Once you set your mind to something you can do anything!" Walker smiled. Taylor smiled weakly back and nodded his head.
"Dad... I... I am very tired. Do you mind if I go to sleep now?" Taylor asked blinking back his tears, trying to control his emotions.
"Sure. Get some sleep and maybe you will feel a lot better later." Walker assured him as he got up and walked toward the door and turned back to look at Taylor who was still sniffing back the tears. He sadly left the room so Taylor could take a nap.
Taylor watched him leave the room and close the door. He turned onto his side again and started to cry. He felt so sad and scared. If it was so painful to just take a few steps how was he ever going to walk normally on his left hip ever again. He started to shake feeling scared of the future. He wished Jason was here to tell him everything would be okay. Slowly he drifted off to sleep on his tear soaked pillow.


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